Why a guy should reaallly spend on a girl is simple:
In primary school, Social Studies taught us that a mother takes care of the house and a father provides for the family. Now we are older, we see it is not just primary school but what the society firmly believes, teaches and practises.
All her life, on a daily, the girl is constantly reminded that lesson with the warning that if she fails, she’ll never find a husband. I like the part that keeping this always in mind could hopefully make that she would never be caught with her guards down, acting un-wifely. It keeps her responsible, in check and “responsible”, in my opinion, is a really good thing. That said, permit me to stretch this lesson a little further – to make good husbands for the well-groomed wives.
If a woman is expected to be homely to prove she is wife material, a man is expected to spend to prove he is ready to take care of a family. More still, if she is expected to pound yam as smooth as a baby’s butt, fry plantain without burning one and ensure the jellof rice is not too spicy or too salty and all the while wearing a brilliant smile, not complaining and looking as dashing as those fine models, then he should be able to pull some tricks off his magical wallet. Tricks like…I’ll allow you choose but they must be…”magical tricks”. Lest I forget, just as the girl is expected to start showing these wifely-ness as soon as she meets a guy, so must the guy show his husbandly-ness as soon as he meets a girl.
The question here is not whether the girl cannot provide these things for herself. After all, he can learn how to cook or become a regular at any Mama Put or simply settle for indomie, but if she should do what she does mindlessly, it is only fair and just that he reciprocates mindlessly. He doesn’t become “her daddy” simply because he bought nine or ten things for her, same way she doesn’t become his “mummy” because she regularly makes the weekly soup and stew for him every other weekend. If he would not understand that she cannot cook certain meals no matter how common they are, he shouldn’t expect her to understand when he cannot spend on COMMON things. It is simply tit for tat.
Some guys with my neighbour’s grandfather’s mentality would say they told a girl that their first date would be in a roadside buka only to test her and see how she is with money – a spender or an investor. Well, honey, while that is good, realise she too might be testing you to see how you also are with money – ready to put your money where your mouth is or stingy.
These things could very easily work both ways. We could live our lives like it’s trade by barter or we could be like Christians and do unto others. Truth is …you decide.
This line of thought is nothing new. It is built on the existing FLOP in the “society’s” perception. If she is expected to be homely as a wife material, he too has got to bring some husband material to the table. Period.
Or, hold on, what’s your two kobo? (Drop your coins in the comment section below & be sure it makes a chang-ching!)
Image Source: Carthrottle